It’s not that you don’t care about your finances…it’s just that you can’t seem to get really get them reigned in, right?  You start out with good intentions-  to start a budget, to start saving more, to stop the impulse shopping…but every month something seems to happen and your righteous path to financial freedom and independence is once again derailed.  So, what’s with that?

Chances are, if you’re struggling each month to stay on the wagon with your finances, you may be a victim of one of these 7 financial saboteurs:

1.  Your Goals Are Unrealistic, Unfamiliar, or frankly, Un-fun:

To have any financial success, whether with budgeting, saving or spending less, we often approach our goals like an angry totalitarian- it’s “ALL OR NOTHING BABY!” …but honestly, it’s not.  If you’re setting your goals so far beyond your reach that you give up prematurely, feel frazzled or dread the task at hand, you’re setting yourself up for failure.  

Re-evaluate your goals to make sure you can hit small milestones regularly and that you can (somewhat) enjoy the process.

2.  You Blame Yourself For Your Past Mistakes:

Some people can quit an addiction cold turkey, others need to take gradual steps to tackle bad habits.  If you’ve gotten yourself into debt, don’t think you need to beat yourself up over your past mistakes.  If you’ve avoided saving and are worried you’ve dampened your chances of getting on track- stop the negative thinking!  The fact that you’re confronting past mistakes and attempting to remedy your behaviors is a huge improvement!

Don’t punish yourself for the past, realize that it provided you with the information needed to spot your problem areas and behavior and move forward.  Beating yourself up keeps you in the past, not a financially savvy future.

3.  You’re Hanging Out With the Wrong Crowd:

Just as your parents probably worried about your friend circle as a teen, you should be just as aware of who is influencing you around your money today.  Peer pressure may have gotten you to drink underage at 16, but I assure you- it’s just as strong to drop a paycheck on a fun night out on overpriced cocktails when your friends aren’t aligned with your saving goals.  You don’t have to drop your high-priced friends, but know that you need to be aware of how their influence impacts your spending choices.

Awareness of your outside influences, coupled with an incorporation of a friend or mentor who is on the same page with your goals is a key to getting your money in check!

4.  You’re Worried About Appearances:

Change, is painful at times- but sometimes fear what others will think of that change that keeps us making bad financial choices or living beyond our means.  Cutting back on holiday gift giving or simply not indulging in a shopping spree while out with friends can feel as if everyone will think you’re stingy or you’ve simply “changed.”  It’s very easy to give gifts you can’t afford, buy new outfits you don’t need to have something “fresh” for a big event or to keep up with spending habits just to keep up appearances, but perpetuating a false image of yourself keeps yourself from financial and personal authenticity.

Know that cutbacks or changes in spending don’t have to last forever, nobody will see you as a Scrooge- but if they do?  Know that they’ll be paying off that vacation well into the next decade and you will be better for not caving into the pressure to keep up appearances.

5.    You’re Simply Procrastinating & Time=Money.

I have two words for you:  COMPOUND INTEREST.  Just as debt seems to spiral out of control to grow and grow if left unchecked, so can wealth.  The longer you keep your head in the sand about your financial situation, the more opportunities you miss.    Interest +  Time =success.

Go over your debts and see which has the highest interest rate in order to pay it off first, or see if you can do a balance transfer (ONLY if you are sure you can pay off the debt before the low/zero interest rate expires!)  but also go through your savings and make sure you’re putting away a bit each month into a savings account for your  emergency fund at a high interest rate.  Check bankrate.com or checkingfinder.com to find better checking or savings accounts.

6. You Insist Money Management Has to Be HARD:

If you want to be a financial success, make your good habits automatic so that you don’t think about it (because thinking about it makes room for excuses not to do it!)  Set up an automatic deposit to a savings account during each pay period so that you don’t have to manually do it (again, because you won’t!), and go ahead and bite the bullet and set up a ROTH IRA while you’re on a roll and set up automatic payments for that as well.  See a great article on Roth IRA’s here @ Get Rich Slowly.

Above all else, keep your finances simple, fun and automatic. Good habits (like paying off debt or contributing to a retirement account) should be set up to occur automatically so you can’t talk yourself out of it.  Chances are, it’ll be so easy, you’ll forget about the extra money you’ve stashed and 12 months later you’ll be amazed at how much you’ve saved.

7.  You’re Secretly Hoping for a Miracle:

That raise is coming,  and when it does, then I’m going to save!  It’s okay to be in debt, because eventually, I’ll be saved by an inheritance from some random relative!   I don’t have to worry about my retirement now while I’m young-  eventually I’ll make enough money but will rely on payday loans 1 hour for now until you can get a plan together or cut spending.  Maybe you think your parents can bail you out, or you don’t need to face the music of your finances until you decide to get married?

I’m an eternal optimist, that’s for sure, but one thing I see people do again and again is to fall victim to the hopes that someone will save them from their finances instead of taking responsibility today- don’t let that be you! As tempting as it is to hope that a rich unknown relative will leave you a hefty inheritance or that Mr./Mrs. Right will also be a trust fund baby, wouldn’t that windfall be better as a boost, not the life preserver you might drown waiting for?

What is one of your biggest money lessons from when you were younger?

So, do any of these sound like you?  Know that we all do a bit of self-sabotage from time to time, and understanding our behaviors is the first step in tackling our financial roadblocks!  If you have any other you’ve spotted, please share your wisdom with your fellow readers!

For each of us, there have been times when our money (or lack of it) has ruled our lives and put a stranglehold on our ambitions, adding daily stresses to our lives now, and sucking the life out of our future dreams.  

On Frugal Beautiful, I want as many people as possible to live debt free and save for the future.  I firmly believe in paying for everything in full and having the money in the bank so you can provide for the people you love.  Being in debt, or simply, living in fear that you can even afford your living is no way to go through life.

I’m writing this blog post from Cloud 9, well, actually, from my home office, but the point is- I just returned from my first trip to Walt Disney World, ever, to run the Princess Half Marathon.  Not only did I get to experience this world class event, and take a great vacation, but I got to spend it with the man I love, after 3 months of living apart in a long distance relationship.

When my boyfriend and I first started dating, we knew I would be moving to California- we didn’t know where the relationship would lead or how long we’d be “dating long distance,” but decided to plan for a vacation in February to run the Princess Half Marathon together. At the time, when we sat down and did the math, I was overwhelmed, frightened and a bit sick to my stomach.  I had just graduated with my M.A., so student loan payments were due, I was still looking for full time employment and the trip itself would cost about $1,300 in total.  I had the money in the bank to pay for the race registrations, but knew I would have to save up, penny by penny to get the rest of the cash to make this trip happen.

Six months ago, I felt totally out of control with my money, but I was committed to regaining control of both my money, and my life.  Each week, I took on side hustle projects, put a few dollars in the bank towards the trip and of course, schemed about the amazing fun we would have.  I knew that by the time I arrived in Orlando, I would have the trip PAID FOR so that I could be fully present and not be stressed about paying for it all.

If you’ve ever been lying about your money or secretly in debt, you know how hard it can be to really enjoy what you’re spending your money on! In my heart, I knew that relying on my boyfriend to foot the bill, borrowing from family or hiding behind a credit card would not be an option. I wanted this trip to feel 100% authentic and needed to feel totally at ease when I arrived.

Of course, even with the frugal hacks I used and the money saving tactics, there were times I felt totally guilty when buying an overpriced chocolate dipped strawberry or treating my boyfriend to an ice cold (gasp, $8) beer when we “could have” held back- but I felt free and confident to splurge knowing that I had earned this moment, and I had saved for it.

Too many of us are hiding behind our debts or we are living a lifestyle that’s a lie since we can’t afford it.  We live in an instant gratification society, but taking the time to savor, afford and enjoy what we spend our money on makes it so much more worthwhile.

At Walt Disney World, I did some shopping.  Stuffed animals, Mickey ears, candy & more overpriced goodies than I care to admit.  We splurged on fancy dinners and noshed on french desserts- we were overindulgent and instantly gratified, but honestly, there was nothing “instant” about it.  I saved for months for this trip, and while it’s over, I’m still riding the high since I know that when the credit card payment comes due, I can pay it off!

For my amazing readers, I wish this for each of you.  Dream big, make plans, save often and live debt free.  Knowing that you can overindulge while still living a life in balance with the people you love is the most authentic way to rule your money without it ruling you!

For me, six months ago- traveling to Walt Disney World seemed like a ridiculous dream for a fresh grad student on a tight budget, but I knew that if I could work at it, bit by bit, even the crazy dream of doing a week in Orlando could become a reality.

Every time I put away $5 or $10 to hit that savings goal for the trip, I imagined the dream coming true- spending time with my own Prince Charming at the Princess Half Marathon!  Trust me readers, making a few shopping sacrifices here and there for a big picture goal is so worth it, and even if your goal is to scuba dive in Hawaii or remodel your kitchen, you can do it!

Start now.  Dream big, make plans, save often and of course, live debt free- the victory is much sweeter when you get there!

So, what’s your crazy big dream?

Have you ever saved for a big goal, how did you do it?

I’ve gotten a few reader questions about how I was able to afford my trip to Walt Disney World for the Princess Half Marathon.  I will have more tips on how I cut expenses really soon, but how I was able to fund this expensive trip, even after cutting costs is an article within itself!

As a frugal girl, I had total sticker shock when I began saving for the Princess Half Marathon.  While I cut costs wherever I could by planning on packing my own meals, looking for deals on airfare and splitting hotel costs with my running buddy- there’s no doubt about it, planning a trip to Walt Disney World to run a half marathon can be really expensive!

Here’s My “As Frugal As Possible” runDisney Walt Disney World Vacation Budget:

Races:        $170.00

Airfare:       $471.60

Hotel:         $362.20

Gear:           $50.00

Shopping:  $100.00

Food:           $150.00

Total:         $1,303.00  <– YIKES.

That’s even after I used as many discounts as possible & decided to pack my own food, DIY a costume & split costs with my boyfriend, it was still darn expensive!

I truly feel that frugal people can afford anything with the right planning, and planning is twofold:  plan to find deals as often as you can, but also plan to start saving money to pay for your travel far in advance.   Back in August, when I purchased my ticket for the Princess Half Marathon and booked my airline ticket (which I had to buy right away),  I knew it was going to take a serious savings plan to make sure I could pay off my runDisney vacation without relying on credit card debt to handle it and fund the rest of the trip in full.

The key to saving for any large expenditure, runDisney vacation or otherwise is to plan for a series of small, weekly saves and larger, impulse saves to boost your goals & sock away extra money to hit them faster.

I’ve been using ImpulseSave for awhile now to sock away extra money for a rainy day, but it was critical in helping me simplify my savings goals during the last six months to pay for my trip to Walt Disney World.  When I used the site to propel a goal I was passionate about, it was exciting to put money away instead instead of spending it!

So, how’d I do it?

Each week, I would put away around $20- the ImpulseSave interface instantly updates my weekly savings to approximate when I hit my savings goal.  Since I had already paid for my race ticket & booked my airline ticket far in advance to take advantage of earlybird deals (paid off), I still had about $650 of expenses unaccounted for.  My goal was to save at least $750 to pay for the rest of my trip and have it in the bank before I boarded the plane.  Looking at ImpulseSave’s timeline- I knew by putting away an automatic $20 a week, I’d have $480 of that saved automatically without much effort.

The other $270 would have to come from my “impulse saves,” of when I resisted temptation to buy something I didn’t need or was gifted some extra cash for Christmas.   Every time I earned extra money or decided to save money by not buying something I didn’t need- that money was quickly added to my ImpulseSave goal for my runDisney vacation.   I picked up some extra freelance work and sold some old books on Amazon to add money to my fund- Impulse Saving gets addicting when you see how quickly a few bucks shaves down your timeline!

*Notice that dip? That was when I had an emergency funding issue, had to withdraw, and was so annoyed by my lack of progress I doubled my efforts to save that money back and will hit my $750 goal in time!

Honestly, I loved my experience with ImpulseSave because it helps you do two things:

1. It makes saving quick, easy and best of all- automatic. The money is transferred weekly before you miss it.

2. If you struggle with impulse shopping, the ImpulseSave interface makes it easy to reframe that behavior by saving instead of spending.

In all honesty, though I write a lot about finances, I am only human and previous to using ImpulseSave, I often faced big purchases unprepared since I didn’t transfer money to set aside for the future.  There are times when I know I need to save money for a major goal, to put cash away for an emergency fund or for travel expenses, but I simply don’t do it.  I couldn’t believe that I hit my $750 savings goal without the pain and frustration it normally takes to save.  Truly, if I see the money in my main checking account, I spend it- and when it comes time to pay for a major purchase I didn’t budget for, I’m caught off guard.

Using this system, I not only saved the $750 for my trip before I actually go on the trip (because darnit, it is fun to hit that goal), I’ve also set up new goals for my move to Chicago, an emergency fund and started a fund for a wedding (since I have more than enough time to save!).  Each account gets anywhere from $5-30 a week and I know exactly what date I’ll hit my goal and how much money I’d need to chip in to hit the goal ahead of schedule- so simple!

What money saving tips have you used to save for a big goal?

Disclosure: I have been a loyal ImpulseSave user for the past year and used their site to save for my trip to attend the Princess Half Marathon.  I recently had the opportunity to partner with ImpulseSave as a sponsor to talk about my user experience to save for this trip, but opinions and the data provided are entirely my own.

I was on a chat the other day with a good friend of mine that was telling me that she really wanted to relocate to a new city, but couldn’t do so yet because she was afraid of “not having enough money.” Before we delve into today’s post, let’s delve into the fear that surrounds having “enough,” and what it means to truly “be broke.”

Two years ago, I was getting ready to leave for graduate school which was a cross-country move with no job lined up. I didn’t get funding for my program and I was terrified of going broke. TERRIFIED to the point that I couldn’t sleep at night and I would start to draw up budget charts with Crayola markers as if that would help me better control each and every penny that came and left my bank account. I was micromanaging my entire life as if doing so would help me combat the fear of the unknown and most of all, the panic attack inducing fear of “going broke.”

Truth be told, if you would have asked me what “enough” money was, I couldn’t tell you. I vowed that I needed enough money to be comfortable and feel safe, but I couldn’t put a number to it. That idea, right there is the point of this post- unless you can put an attainable and realistic dollar amount to your fear, you’re letting it rule your life.  Most of us have never really been truly, hopelessly broke but the idea of being broke seem so scary that it guides our decisions.

When all was said and done and I finally started living in the city, I needed to make $1,000 a month to live comfortably. That would cover everything- rent, utilities, food, entertainment and of course money that might as well have been burned. Problem was, I rarely, if ever, made $1,000 a month as an unfunded graduate student working a part time job and I started to dip into savings.

The first few months I had to use my emergency fund, I went into panic mode. I started going over my Excel spreadsheets and guilting myself for not being able to live within the $800 a month I was making (yes, I realize now that was crazy, but when it was all I had, you can imagine I was going to try like hell to make it work and regain control!) My savings account got smaller and smaller- I could feel myself plummeting into my impending doom of bag-lady living, going destitute and being miserable. I thought life sucked now, and it was only going to suck more when I went completely broke.

Guess what? Two years later, I have LESS in my savings account than I did two years ago. I have nearly no money saved (not that it’s anything to brag about, but I am debt free and most of my student loans are nearly paid off.) I have about 3 months of living expenses set aside, and while that isn’t ideal, I want to make the point that I’m better than I have ever been.

Truth is, there are people living on half of what we have and they’re twice as happy.  We’re not as afraid of going broke & hitting bottom as we are of having “less” than someone else.

The main “demon” that I tackle on Frugal Beautiful is debt- especially consumer debt. The bulk of young women I deal with are grappling with debt from shopping addictions or fancy apartments they couldn’t afford in a down economy, the rest of us are simply trying to live with what we’ve got and are struggling to save up a nest egg. Yet, as I had this conversation the other day, I had to wonder, how many of us are hiding behind the idea of “having enough money” and it’s preventing us from doing what we really, truly want to do?

Some women never need an excuse to do what they want (usually though, this is in terms of buying stuff) yet there are plenty of us who grapple with guilt and punish ourselves for not having enough. Additionally, we may hide behind the fear of being a bag lady without a decent emergency fund to the degree where we never take a risk, relocate, go travel, start a business or quit a job we hate simply because we cannot fathom what it’s like to not have what we have now.

I can tell you from experience that if all the money you had now were gone, you’d be okay. It would suck, but you would survive.

There are plenty of people that truly are on the edge of disaster with their savings where one small emergency could lead to home foreclosure, a lawsuit or necessitating they sell off everything they own to have a roof over there head- I would wager that most of us are nearly not that bad off… the worst we would face would be canceling memberships, taking a second job or selling off *some* of our stuff.

I strongly feel that most people who have never experienced poverty have no idea how little they could really live off of.  I don’t think anyone that has had to actually “just survive” knows what true, simple survival is like-  but the idea of having to give things up, to change a lifestyle, to not live up to the standards of “well off,” that we’ve set for ourselves scares the bejeesus out of us.  We cannot truly be scared of living on the streets because chances are, that would never be an issue- the heart of the fear is change, uncertainty and feeling insufficient.

Most of us, even on our worst days would never actually be homeless- someone would always help out.  We would never be homeless and hopeless, that’s beyond comprehension for the average person, what we truly fear is losing our privilege and our minds are running amuck with doomsday scenarios that will never actually pan out.  The fear of sacrifice and living on less (read: NOT living on NOTHING) is what keeps us from quitting a sh*tty job, marrying our lover or relocating to our dream city.

We have nothing to fear but fear itself, because trust me, if you allow yourself to take a risk and sh!t hits the fan, you will amaze yourself at your own blood, sweat and ingenuity to make it right again.

Or, you can live in fear and never know what it’s like to feel free and self-sufficient, your choice.

It’s A New Year.  It’s Time To Give Yourself Permission to Celebrate Your Life & Celebrate Your Money.

You’re human.  Chances are, like all of us- you’ve made some bad choices in the past with your money, or life happened and you were caught off guard with expenses, leaving you in debt.   Let it go.  

Turn a new page and walk in the wisdom that you have the strength to get out of, or stay out of debt in 2012, and now, you have the support.

If you’re facing what seems to be insurmountable debt, give yourself a pat on the back.  You’ve come to the right place.  If you’re recently paid off your debt- congratulations to you!  You have a place here too!  I’m calling for you to become a Debt Free Diva- either vowing to pay down your debt or to vow to stay out of debt with consistency!

If you’re serious about getting or staying debt free- join my collection of phenomenal women who have taken the pledge to be a Debt Free Diva, I’ve saved a spot just for you!

Several phenomenal women have taken the pledge here.  I know it sounds scary to make that kind of public commitment, but isn’t that the kind of push you might be needing to stay accountable?  Nobody’s perfect, and we aren’t asking you to be- what we are asking you to do is to try, and take that first step in joining a community that is here to support you.  Being a Debt Free Diva is a community and a lifestyle that we are all working on together, and nobody’s here to judge.

 What we all want for you is to be debt free, have some support in getting wise with your money and celebrate your successes, dust you off when you have a bad day, and work on being financially free together.

If you’re ready for something new, something bold and to be financially free no matter what you’re bringing to the table- head to the Debt Free & Fabulous page and get ready!